3rd Rock from the Sun

I like to watch 3rd Rock from the Sun reruns every now and then. I think it's hilarious! I just found 5 seasons on Netflix. I've probably seen every episode but I like to revisit any chance I get. Here are some 3rd Rock from the Sun quotes.

Harry: "Women! You can't live with them and yet, they're everywhere!"

Dick: "I mean that from the heart of my bottom."

Tommy: "They were just so big, round, and beautiful...I just had to touch them."
Dick: "Then what?"
Tommy: "Then she said, 'Ow! My eyes!' and that just killed the mood!"

Dick: "This is funny...my throat tickles."
Harry: "Yeah, mine too. I tried to scratch it with a stick but that just brought up a whole new set of problems."

Harry: "You know, I heard a man can stretch his nerve endings from San Fransico to New
York....but, he would die."

Dick reading the Bible: "Don't listen to the serpent!" *turns the page* "Don't eat the fruit! Don't eat the fruit!" *turns the page, sighs, and slams it closed* "Women!"

Sally: "Oh no. This guy at a restaurant had a birthday and they set his food on fire and blew on it."

Dick: "Oh. My. God! I'm gorgeous!"

Sally: "Ya know, cars must have some huge power we haven't discovered yet. Look at this, the lines, the waiting, the testing!"
Harry: "Yeah, can you imagine what you must have to go through to get a gun?!"

Mary: "I'll be brutally frank."
Dick: "Good. I'll be genuine Dick."

Sally: "Oh my god Dick, what if this lying thing falls into the hands of the politicians?"
Harry: "That's a horrifying thought."

Dick: "What have you got there, Harry?"
Harry: "Well, yesterday I was exploring the park and I found this stone. Look at it, it's been worn to a perfect sphere by the elements and dimpled by time."
Sally: "Harry, that's a golf ball."

(Dick packing for a trip with Mary.)
Sally: "Wait, why are you taking refrigerator magnets?"
Dick: "Chicago. The windy city. I think it's obvious."
Sally: "What do you mean?"
Dick: "Ok, let's say an urgent message comes in for Dr. Albright and she's out sightseeing. I lay it on the nightstand because I have no way of securing it to a metallic surface. A gust of WIND blows in under the bed and Mary never discovers her long lost identical twin all for want of a magnetic banana!"

(Dick and Mary on a plane.)
Dick: "Oh my god! Out there! There's something on the wing!"
Mary: "It's an engine!"
Dick: "This thing is a death trap! Sky waitress! Sky waitress!"

Mary: "Look, it's starting to snow."
Dick: "Oh my god."
Mary: "What's the matter? Haven't you ever seen a snowflake before?"
Dick: "Yes and I prayed I would never see them again. Turn on the highbeams. They fear the light."

Lady in restaurant: "Ya know, you're boyfriend is kinda cute."
Mary: (points at Dick) "Him?"
Lady: "The way he spent the last hour knocking himself out trying to get your attention."
Mary: "Oh, he's an idiot."
Lady: "Honey, they're all idiots. But this one is looking at you as if you're the only woman on the planet and although you're real pretty, you're not exactly the last sandwich in Hungry Town if you get my drift."

Tommy: "Harry, if I asked you out on a date would you reject me because of these elbows?"
Harry: "Nope, I would reject you because I like ladies."

Dick to Harry's girlfriend: "Don't try to change the subject you processed-steak frying-bottom feeding-floozy!"
Harry: "You will put Miss in front of that if you know what's good for ya!"

Dick: "Optimism has no place in reality! Guess what? Santa Clause is dead! Beaten senseless for his shiny black boots! And his reindeer don't give a d***!"

Dick to his class: "Tomorrow there will be a pop quiz. Remember, it's a pop quiz! If you study, I'll know!"

Dick: "Harry, you have a thing in your head."
Harry: "A thing?"
Dick: "A cranial micro receiver chip."
Harry: "In my head..."
Dick: "Yes, but it's not in the part you use. It's in your brain!"

Dick: "I'm Dr. Solomon, where's my son? My son Harry!"
Police officer: "Well the good news is, he's alive."
Dick: "Oh! Thank God!"
Police officer: "But, I have to warn you, he don't look so good."
Dick: *gasp*
Police officer points at Harry. Dick turns around.
Dick: "Oh, that's what he always looks like."

Harry: "I was on my way to the big race and a paper bag blew across the road and I was afraid that it was full of bunnies so I swerved. . . "

Sally talking to babies: "Aw, don't cry sweetheart. This part is easy. . .just wait until you have to chose a long distance carrier. (Pause.) I wish I could have started from scratch like you guys. Knowing, but not knowing. Seeing and then all at once forgetting. Enjoy it. Time here moves really fast."

Dick to Evil Dick: "You can't live in the past, you have to live in the now. This is the 90's, girlfriend."

Dick: "You know, you never see yourself clearly until you see yourself through your lover's eyes. I am red FREAKIN hott!"